ispkjersyshore writes

being single is getting a little tedious now

Gojojo writes

Single life is great, on that flirting and not having to answer to anyone. I was in a 16 year relationship and the other person went off with someone else so for me single life is great and live for the moment.

tasvespagirl writes

Looking back I can see that I was always miserably single, even when I was married. Being the wrong person does that. Now that I have done away with "him" I am happy as a single woman.

It has given me a breathing space to get used to my new existence and decide what I want from the rest of my life. There is plenty of time to find someone to share the love that has been stored up inside me for far too long.

My only regret is that the penny didn't drop years earlier.

Karen.

Renztar writes

I never go past 2 months with a lady...soooo I guess I have never been in an actual relationship. I get used to it and doing things on my own alot. I guess deep down I would like to find someone that I can grow old with for sure. But the older I get not knowing how to behave when I am with someone or knowing how relationships work the less confident I become. Even when I meet new friends...everyone wants to know everyones story, past relationships etc...if I have felt deeply for someone..it is embarrassing to have to explain at the end of the story that it was about someone I was only with for a cple of months.Especially if someone has just told me about their 10 or 20 year relationship coming to an end..So I just prefer to leave it.
Usually when I decide to be honest about how I feel to a girl or if I am really into them and decide yes they feel it too..it just seems to be very bad timing and suddenly I am no longer interesting enough or I have scared them off ..wooops...he he. Now I no longer envision being with someone who wants to take things to a deeper level anymore. I guess I have random moments of hope, then I do things like sign up to PinkSofa...Still I kind of think of it the same as winning the lottery lol... But u have to be in it to win it I guess :-D

fernovz writes

I'm single but i don't mind it at all right now. Love is waiting..

Despo writes

You've gotta love yourself first and the best. Otherwise its too much pressure for a relationship when you do find it and end up pinning everything on that. Its kind of cliche, but very important i think. You know the whitney housten song? Greatest love of all? I love that song. I'm gonna go sing it to myself now. Bye

iamreal writes

ive got the sunday single blues.you know its sunday,im still single.my favourite thing to do on sunday mornings is to wake up in the arms of my beautiful girlfriend.make sweet love.fall blissfully back to sleep again with my face in her silky soft breasts.shower have breakfast together.lounge on the couch together and decide how we will spend the rest of day.go out for coffee,art gallery,walk the dog? im such a good catch.a wasted resource!
oh well good thing i can amuse myself.thanks for listening girls.

Kiwibiker writes

I am hopelessly single because I like to take things slowly. Most woman move far too quickly for me and it freaks me out. I can't give everything at once until I am sure and comfortable with the idea. When I explain where I am at, they get septic and loose interest. I just figure well it's not meant to be. Most women just haven't learnt the difference between lusty love and love love.

hudat writes

I have been single for many years and enjoy it. At first it was difficult feeling guilty for leaving the relationship etc, but over the years it has become a way of life. These days it's not that I choose to be single more that I am because I have not met anyone I want to share my life with, or anyone who would fit in with my life and wasting time on "possibles" is not an option, sure would be nice for someone to sweep me off my feet... but all in time I guess....and in the meantime I have learned so much about life and about myself that It is not necessary for me to be in a relationship.

WebWench1975 writes

I've been single since early 2008 when I came out and also came out of my straight relationship. For first time I've lived solo and love it - living with ex was very easy too - but I'm pretty secure with my current sitch. Happy to play the batchelorette and meet, hang out and have fun with people.

I find what helps is you keep busy: find stuff to fill time - eg. volunteering/study/meditation/sport/library/social groups are some suggestions eg. life won't feel empty and as lonely - if your self-esteem is dependant on a relationship, could help to speak to someone about it - never rely on someone else to feel good about you - and varied activities puts you in a sitch to meet someone if ready and open to it :-)

nancyblue writes

Apart from some brief interludes i have ben single for a few years now. Seems imposible to find someone you're compatible with....here's to better luck (again!) next year.

vtpurplemoose writes

i just became single by my own doing for a change. we were together five years. but things got stale. and no matter what i did couldnt revive it. we had just grown to far apart. am ajusting to being single. but it does get lonely at night. want the passion back that has been gone so long. if u know what i mean.lol what happened to happly ever after? guess its not for me but will keep trying. ;~))

blackcat71 writes

I have just become single after 2 very close relationships and im just starting to enjoy it. i can do what i want go where i want and leave a place when i want without asking if its ok to go hate that. So all in all im enjoying being single and hope to be for a while

girlfeed writes

Why am I single? I'm a good person and I treat my ladies very well. I'm sick of random hooking up. It's getting boring. It's time I wasn't single. :)

syida writes

ive been single almost all my life.... except for some short dates.... i tink its hard for me to suddenly adapt to being in a relationship... they expect too much from me in a short time... i get freaked out and leave... of course i would like to love and be loved but, i frreak out easily and they get irritated and annoyed.... hmm....

xgigglesx writes

yea i wish someone would sweep meoff my feet never had a proper gf only ou rececntly an when u move countrys it doesnt exactly make it easy no friends to begin with i dont choose to be single i dont think u can choose its not ur fault if u dont meet somebody but u want to u know?! just like i havent but i want to

m_ianni writes

Well i have mostly been single most of my life but then early 2007 i met someone for 5 months then we broke it off . I guess you just get use to it being single. But i am just one of thoes people that just plods along with life take things as they come ,eventually someone will come along again not to worry :).

minstrels writes

single life can be fun......for a while! I miss waking up next to someone, and everything that goes with it!
i agree that nothing is wrong with being single, and yes one does choose to be single, but then again i wouldn't want to just go out with anyone.

love2dance writes

Hey bug1949 I agree with you totally.

Rockspud writes

...it sucks!!!

iamsweetas writes

i want someone to sweep me off my feet!

heidim1 writes

I believe that being single has it's place, as does being in a relationship. I've been single for about 18 months now, after a 12 year relationship, and I'm still working through issues (finance etc).

I have found myself again in that time, and learnt to stand on my own two feet and face the world (still have some bad days though). My family have all expressed the opinion that I have come back to the person they knew before my relationship (abusive).

Relationships also have their place, and I most definatly won't rule out being in one again - especially with the right woman. I dated a woman last year who's longest relationship had lasted 3 months - (she was 45), and it showed - the automatic caring and thoughtfulness towards a partner wasn't there - she had never learnt this and wasn't willing to try. No thanks, I'd rather be with a woman who has had meaningful relationships in the past - even with the baggage, as I know that she will value what we have to offer each other.

kanin writes

I reckon being single is great! As long as you're comfortable with yourself. Although this is almost even more important if you're in a relationship, otherwise it just becomes some sort of refuge, which it shouldn't be!

Read JustABoi's comments and totally agree, and also thought that some people at certain times in their lives just dont have time, or the need, for a relationship.

Whatever floats your boat, like, as long as you're happy and comfortable in your own skiin. Otherwise life will always seem empty and boring.

softballgirl81 writes

It's hard being single I find that all my friends around me have partners and are happy and here I am alone and the only people that hit on me are men I feel doomed. I have had an extremely bad experience with love you give yourself to that one particular person and your never prepared for the end to come. I was devastated but am slowly starting to recover and I believe that I am ready to get out there and find my soulmate.

freestyler80 writes

Hey there
Yes being single has its good and bad points.
Me personally I tend too fall for the wrong ones. Like at the moment I'm in Lust with this girl in my workplace, but she is funny around me and can't really talk too me. I think she gay but in the closet.
This makes it hard, cause dating other gals then see her everyday, ggrrr frustrating.
So take it for wat its worth, flirt, and enjoy your freedom is wAT I say.

tearii_iD writes

i hate being single it sucks..and coz im shy im always single..sucks!!

frilly_lizard writes

being single really sucks at time
I stretch out across my bed, cause I can, as no one is there
Do I miss the cuddles? do I miss the kisses? Do I miss going off on a romantic weekend?
Do I miss cooking that special meal for two?
YES I do miss it, but I also enjoy being with me.
Funny creatures aren't we?

rockface writes

Hi JUSTABOI... just read your post on being single and totally relate to you.. I applaud you for having the confidence/honesty to be who you are and not compromise yourself to accomodate someone else. I know life is about making choices/compromises but everybody,s definition is different and needs to be respected even if one doesn't agree..!! Thankfully times are a-changing and people don't buy into 'society's peerception' that one needs to be partnered to be complete...

forevergirl writes

I think that it is nice to be in a good relationship but barring that having great friends and a cat works just as well!

NEMETONA writes

Charlie44 you are so right!!
Life is short and chances shuld be taken so you feel alive.

Single is freedom and independence, sure, as long as it does not become a place to hide in fear or never taking the chance. I am coming out at 44 and I want to throw caution to the wind, feel the wind in my hair, dance on hot coals and dance naked by the light of the moon, swim in the rain and most of all be loved. Being single has been safe but I am going to let my hair down, single or not and LIVE FOR REAL.....as who I really am! Blessed Be!!

charlie44 writes

Single is preferable to being with someone who hurts and abuses your feelings. Single is safe, sanity, independence.
Single is lonely, miss the hugs, kisses, spontaneous nights in and out.
Single has pros and cons. So take a chance and risk getting together with someone, if it works Great, if it doesnt at least there is the knowledge that you tried, no "what if" or "if only" Life is short and chances shuld be taken so you feel alive.

bug1949 writes

I just came out of an 18 year relationship and so much of what people have said is true. Sometimes you are with someone because they are just there. I miss all the things we did and there are many memories but what we all want is just someone to love and for them to love us. I think being single now will prove to be an interesting voyage.

happydays82 writes

I have always said some of the best memories n best times of my life are when i have been single, i think it is hard when coming out of a relationship, especially long term ones, as you have been used to having that person in your life, gettin thru the day at work to get home to them, snugglin up together in bed, someone to kiss goodnite, it is like there is something missing, a big void in your life for a while till we adjust. i believe everything happens for a reason, n that our life is drawn out for us, regardless of how certain we may be of something.

kantire writes

Don't settle for someone you can live with- settle for someone you can't live without. Until I find that person I don't mind being single thanks

NichirenLady writes

Being single is no big deal to me. I have been so since 2003. Of course, I am hoping to meet the right lady for me but if I don't, it's no problem. In fact, it's pretty nice because I have the remote all to myself! LOL!

Deb

NichirenLady writes

Being single is no big deal to me. I have been so since 2003. Of course, I am hoping to meet the right lady for me but if I don't, it's no problem. In fact, it's pretty nice because I have the remote all to myself! LOL!

Deb

kittiefem writes

i want to met someone to share my life with, not to loose myself in. I've seen that happen around me and dont want it to happen to me. I think thats why I dont so egerly pursue meeting people.

victory_rose writes

I love being single most of the time. Im too selfish at the momment. I do what I want to do, I see who I want to see and dont have to answer to anyone. I have been single for a while now and feel very comfortable with solitude. I have a great network of friends and family so I dont feel alone or feel as though Im 'missing out'. It gets annoying that I have to keep defending why Im single. I constantly get the 'why dont you have a boyfriend'. 'You should have a boyfriend'. (im not out hahaa) Of course there are times like valentines day where you do feel alittle lonely but overall I love it!

JustABoi writes

I like it. I am a very strong and independent person and very comfortable in my own skin, and HATE being told what to do...so for me a relationship is something I would be in because I choose to be, not because I felt I *needed* to be (if that makes sense?)

I am more than happy with my own company as I am somewhat solitary by nature (and finding someone who understands that need for space in a relationship can be very tricky, I tend to run a mile from clingy/needy types because they are WAY too high maintenance for me and make me totally claustrophobic - like the last relationship I was in which I just ended for pretty much that reason, oh and she was totally inconsistent, one emotional extreme to the other).

I don't know if I will ever find a relationship that will accommodate my solitary nature while still *being* a relationship, but if I don't, I won't be too upset about it because that's just who I am and I am strong enough not to compromise my self for the sake of being pa

Yuan2 writes

Pros and cons. Couplehood is gd only if you are with the right person. Else you will end up being lonelier than if you are single and alone.

ShandyPantz writes

Single life should be about feeling confident in our own skin, feeling whole on our own and not to feel incomplete. (Not that i always feel like that!)

Perhaps there shouldn't be such a clear distinction between single life and coupledom?

If there wasn't, then maybe we would have the freedom to be 'single' in a relationship and be 'taken' when we're not!

lej168 writes

99% of the time I really love being single. Why you might ask? I really enjoy my own company for a start, there are plenty of things I can do to amuse myself, play games on my x-box or computer, read a book, watch a dvd, go to the movies or out to dinner the list could be endless. I enjoy the fact that its my house, my lounge, my tv, my bed, in fact its all mine and thats what I enjoy. I don't have to worry about someone else's feeling getting hurt, compromising anything which normally means giving something up to please the other person, sharing my time or my space which I really enjoy with anyone. The 1% is that I miss my dog who was my best friend in the world who I had to put down over a year ago. I miss her every day of my life. Occasionally I get lonely so I go see my friends, go online, talk to my relatives on messenger or have a cuppa with my mate who lives very close to me. I've been single for 5 yrs an have enjoyed almost every day of it. The first 2 yrs was spent getting ove

carolelee writes

single life is good 4 a short while but its better 2 have some one to share with.

q-t-pie writes

i have been single for the past year or so and at first i loved it but now its starting to get really empty in my house, lonely during the night, quite during the day and boring. I now hate being single.... all my straight mates are always telling me about there escapades with boyfriends and how much they are having fun and even getting flowers and shit but im sick of it. I HATE BEING SINGLE...... people look at you like your a whore, loser, lepar when they just dont get how lonely u are..... :( single life is the worst...... i mean cool u can perve on whoever you want to perve on but when i see another lesbian couple i just want to break down.... :'( its so bloody depressing....... ok thats my input luv yas mwah ciao

musbysomething writes

I’m single which means I can do what I like
But I can’t, ‘cus I can’t find you.
I’m single which means I am cooking for one
But seem to be eating for two!
I’m single, which gives me both sides of the bed
A spare pillow and too much room.
I’m single, so sleep in old pj’s and socks,
Not mingling our natural perfume.
I’m single, which means that the voice on the answer machine
will be my mother.
I’m single, which means that that text’s from O2
Not ‘see you soon’ from my lover.
I’m single. Me .One. But not with the wrong one
Not trapped and not wasting my time.
I’m pleased to be free and pleased to be me
And will soon find the one that is mine.

sealover writes

I've been single 93.6 percent of my life. Maybe even moreso LOL For the most of my twenties and early 30s I was pondering my sexuality so was very confused and therefore lonely. I also sufferend from acute anxiety. However, I 'Learned" to be alone and then became more outgoing and have been making friends etc. Dunno, sometimes I feel like I'm lucky...I can entertain myself and feel hosetly great alone. Then other times, I feel like I "odd" because I am single. Would I like to be with someone? Sure. However, the realist in me says it's a rare occasion to find someone that worthwhile. So, for now I enjoy making new friends and who knows whats around the corner. The cool thing is I can take it or leave it. When it's real it's real otherwise it's not worth it.

Janine118 writes

i personally think single life sucks!! i enjoy my own space at times but i hate being alone, yes you might have guessed im single lol!! i am described as to nice aparently!!! according to my ex i have a gr8 personality and make her laff so much and im pretty and petite!! so explain why im single!!! i hate it! just need sum1 like me i guess!! but on the single side of things unless your totally over sum1 its hard to move on and thats when single life sucks!!! im at the moving stage, so to all you other singletons dont get attached to easily unless your 100% sure thats what you want xxxx

How_Supplied writes

single is cool n all, but i miss it at the lonely times. I've been in relationships, sometimes i feel that its not for me. But, when in all reality, i need that comfort from another... so i guess being single is cool, but sucks!

innerstar writes

well... mostly i dig it. lots of time for doing what i love doing, i'm comfortable being by myself (currently travelling around asia). but having close friends for affection and affirmation and hugs are important. being able to have sweet encounters would be nice tho. and relationships *are* nice too. i just think both have their pros and cons. i'm working on ideas of hybridising.

rachels61 writes

its good in a way but at the same time loney!
i miss cuddling up to a girl, seeing them smile, laugh, that unexpected kiss on the cheek! what more could you want? but i noticed some girls in lmelb play with your head too much, and lead you on! for once i would like to meet a girl who will be ture!

lukingforlove writes

Single life sucks but then again sometimes it has its good sides. came out of a short relationship about a month ago the girl broke my heart but then again they alol have and thats why i am kinda glad that im single although i do miss sharing times with someone. just wanna find someone who willo wanna be with me n not go n cheat or whatever.

take it easy guys

lukingforlove xx

lukingforlove writes

Single life sucks but then again sometimes it has its good sides. came out of a short relationship about a month ago the girl broke my heart but then again they alol have and thats why i am kinda glad that im single although i do miss sharing times with someone. just wanna find someone who willo wanna be with me n not go n cheat or whatever.

take it easy guys

lukingforlove xx

LoversTwist writes

I have been single a year June. I have had a brief affair more like a fling that I wish never happened. It lasted 2 months till I put a stop to it.
I guess sexual urges overtook my longterm goals of intamacy with a "partner".

I do not plan on "settling" again.I have been on a few dates here at the pink sofa but I am now finding my age seems to be a bother to some.

I am "looking good" at 52,and keep myself fit. I am youthful in ideas and like to participate in some sports and social justice issues.

I do not pretend to be a sports jock and climb mountains, cycle to europe, hike.I do like fishing, water, room service(smile).

In the first 5 months of being single I did like it because I got to do some new things like take a media arts course, join a singles club, meet new friends and go on a few dates here at the sofa.

I am bored with it now. I admit I like being in a relationship. I like being a couple and am completely happiest when in one. I like to show my affection t

Zaharias writes

NOT A LOT!!!!

Zaharias

designergirl writes

I think it can be both good and bad.The good is that you have the freedom to find the right person when you are ready.the bad is trying to find this person!!!

I am single after being married for 8 years.
I am really looking forward to meeting someone with similar interests,so i dont have to keep going to films or travelling alone!
FAce it, what is better??holding a hand in a film and being a bit naughty now and then with somebody? or sitting alone?

Lying on the beach at night looking at the stars alone, or lying on beach with your babe and watching them together curled up in each others arms??

travelling new places and sharing that with someone special or alone with no one to say..''oh wow..look at that?))

I know what i prefer, and it aint me!

luvlygrl writes

I love single life, but miss cuddling and fking and kissing.

Not much of a casual encounter type of girl, so it just doesn't happen.

When I'm not feeling toey, I think the single life is wonderful! Love hanging with friends, playing pool, spotting beautiful women everywhere, without having to apologise to anyone if my eyes wander.

Aah! It is a wonderful thing not to be accountable! A lonely thing sometimes, but with a strong and wide friendship base that's not often an issue.

Not that I wouldn't give up all my independence (some of it - not all of it - I'd go stir crazy) to sit and vege with my love.

ybbag writes

i hate being single

mistermeow2004 writes

I think being single is great. I've been on my own now for 8 years, sometimes I miss the affection of a relationship, but I really love being on my own and having friends and family around me whether it's all the time or just sometimes. I don't know about anyone else, but trust plays a big part in whether you feel comfortable with yourself or/and with others in relationships.

michelle writes

i have been single for 16 years, it doesn't seem weird after about the first four! i'm not sure i could live with someone now and even the thought of a girlfriend freaks me out a bit, i do what i want when and where i want with no constraints. it's not that im selfish, i'm not, i just don't want to have to be answerable to anyone but me.

Aspen writes

You are born alone and you die alone. You, me, all of us are single. Sometimes we get a little help along the way with someone who is meant to teach us a thing 'er two, and vice versa. It is great to have company every now and then, but not when it distracts from your life, or when taken for granted.

Relationships are a thing of the past, and best used to bring up children. It is rare to find a relationship based on love, understanding and growth, which is what a union is about. if you are prepared to do the work, and be patient, then perhaps you will achieve this.

nottmchica writes

I love it...But I can only do it for about 6 months, then I get bored and want something more meaningful!

JustMeNow writes

I'm used to being single, any relationship I do have I manage to wreck soon after. I grew up surrounded by people it is nice to come home and be alone, yes if I am honest it does get cold at night sometimes, but that's life.
They say there is someone out there for everyone, that maybe true but I won't be holding my breath.
The single life is growing on me :)

greenchili writes

I've been alone most of my life, so I am sort of used to it. Would I like to share my life with the right person? Of course. But when I am on my own, I'm okay.

Dragonlover writes

Hello all, I'm a new boardie. What do I think of the single life?

I think the single life is ok, but it does get lonely. Holidays, birthdays, and other occasions that can be spent with someone that you love. It's not too bad, but it is kind of fun, being single I can do what I want, and generally just not have to worry about having to call home to let someone know where I am.
Dating is the best part, meaning you can come home either alone, or not at all.

Anyway, the single life is nice

Thanks!

ajk68 writes

I've been single now for 3 and a bit years after a 9 1/2 year coupledom. The ex went into a new relationship after 4 months (her decision to be single and find herself must have been a short journey LOL) Not sure if I'd want to go back into the day to day relationship thing - I really enjoy being single and not having to answer to anyone. I do miss the cuddles however have a whole bunch of friends I can count on if I ever feel the urge for a hug!

chillinout writes

Hi ladies :)I think youre always in more pain if your partner left you..I also feel you need extended time to dust your heels,sift through your head and have space for you.I personally have already processed it before Ive parted.So Its always been so much easier!..It stays with you for long enough to talk it over with friends or coffee dates who ask what happened to your last relationship?But then It sort of disolves!...You hardly mention it after that.Unles youre questioned about it.Thats because you really need to let it go and not burden some poor new lady that was feeling pretty good about life until she bumped into you today...If you arent processing it before you part,you will not have closure..I dont carry my last relationship into my next..You will find another love that is as good as if not better than the last..Its all that journey some of you have mentioned that is just as rich in pain as is happiness..I just know since coming out in 1996 that I still havent found the one fo

Sweetee writes

Hmmm ..... it sucks !!!

angelfood writes

If I was in a relationship I definitely wouldn't have been forced out of myself to meet new people or to travel the world as I have been. OR at least, those that I would have been in a relationship with would have been stuck to my homeland, in a "nesting" syndrome.

I would love to be in a relationship right now, but it would have to be with someone who wasn't really tied to any one location, as I don't see myself ever wanting to put roots down again - or at least for a long, long long time. So, that kind of complicates things a bit.

I have to say though, overall, I'm not sick of being single, but I'm sick of the social stigma that goes along with being single. Its really screwing with my self-esteem. At first, after I broke up with my ex, I was like "WOOOO, world, I"M SINGLE!". After four years on my own, though, I'm starting to think maybe I'm not relationship material. And that maybe I'm not desirable. And maybe I'll never find someone. And that my friends will continue to te

lids writes

would you want to feel like a beer-mat jammed under a table?

i love being single. i also love not being single. i think that if you're not happy with yourself then, naturally, it's harder to be on your own. old cliche and a bit biblical perhaps but love yourself first before jumping into a relationshp. a lot of people just try and meet someone to fill an empty space in their life. I'd hate to fill someone's empty space, I'd feel like a beer-mat someone jammed under a table to make it stop wobble. if you meet someone you do it 'cause that person adds something extra to your life, like red chili or fresh basil.

Femtoremember writes

I personaly don't like being single but I am by choice. well life to me means lerning something new each and everyday,it also means doing the things in life that we love the most and enjoying everything around me,family ,friends,pets,tree's, ocean breeze, smell of chestnuts roasting,fresh brewed coffee,the smell of fresh cut grass,playing with my grandson (7) yrs old,playing with my dog and cat,and most of all I love all the season of the year,BUT..its best when you have someone to share it with.

Aiki writes

I saw the best t-shirt. It had a great big pink women symbol and in blue letters it said " I think. Therefore I'm single!"

wings83 writes

i've been single for a while now, and i'm OK with being single now, it's not too bad i suppose, though i would really like to meet someone, it seems as if i'll never ever meet the right girl! even trying to meet/message/chat with girls through sofa has been unsuccessful so far, but i will keep trying though, i can't be single for ever! at least i hope not!

baseboi writes

Single life entails for me a time for growth, healing and reflection. Unfortunately for me, the past five years have had little time between each 'relationship' but I have learned from these experiences. It wasn't as if I am afraid of being alone, I just wanted to be with them on more than a few occasions! So I am 33 and have been out since I was 14. I can't count how many relationships I have been in on one hand, I would need hands and feet and count the digits. This isn't something to be proud of but I do enjoy life and all of them I have loved dearly on different levels. As I was adopted and had some issues about the maternal love, I have figured out that perhaps my search for love was looking for a 'motherly' figure or making 'women pay' for the neglect and rejection suffered as a kid. But I am over that and see myself as a sorted individual quite happy to embark on singledom for a while & not fall for every cheeky sexy smile that is flashed my way.

JSteph writes

It's just okay right now. I have been single a couple of years now... I do not want to be with someone just for the sake of it. So I am looking carefully and taking my time to find it all.
I would prefer to be sharing my experiences and my love with one special person than be single right now. But I am probably single because that's where I should be for some reason.
I am starting to make more female friends, real good friends. In the past females as friends seemed to be more interested in themselves than the friendship.

GreenEyedPixie writes

There are times that I really like being single...the freedom of it, the adventure and the possibilities.
However, there are other times that I'd do anything to find the right person with whom to share my life.

beautyandbliss writes

It can be good, and it can be bad. For the most part, I am fine being single, but there can always be a sense that a little something is missing :)

slipcover writes

Sharing and caring most people can't do these things that is why the world is the way it is

sailorgirl writes

I am 34 and have never been in a relationship. I would very much like to be in a relationship, but sometimes wonder how I would manage to live with someone else. I am so used to being able to do what I want, when I want, and am not sure how difficult I would find it to have to take someone else into consideration. For most of my adult life I have been flatting, so I do know that I can share a house with others. For the last two and a half years I have owned my own house, and live in it alone. I love there being nobody there when I come home tired from work, so I can collapse without having to talk to someone. It is when I have energy that I wish there was somebody else around.

madonnalover writes

Right about now, it's really fun! Considering what I came out of, I wouldn't trade it. I've now gone on to do more things for ME, plan a vacation, and have been able to make current friendships flourish. It's really fun right now- but it will get old. That's when you find something else to do! LOL

@pax writes

it has its ups and downs... i love being independent but it would be great to come home to someone. i have been single for about a year now and before that I was serial (6 years)!

i do love being single. there are no rules and you are responsible for what you choose to do and how happy you are... in any case, i have the freedom to explore what's out there and i'm really enjoying doing just that!

TOGDBGLRY writes

What interesting posts. Let's see...the longest relationship I was in was about 2/3 years or so. Didn't work out. Sometimes, I want the company of someone else, but more than not, I really enjoy having my time to myself. I guess I'm kinda selfish in that area. Me and my fiance broke up in 2003. I don't know. I am looking for the right person, and I believe God is going to send that person, but until then, I do not allow myself to get down, because for me, that can lead to disaster...been there, done that. Not going there again. I am a weightlifting fanatic, I attend church, and am currently in college. These things keep me pretty busy. Do I sometimes become lonely? I'd be a liar if I said I didn't, but I must admit, I do have a great life today. One day at a time, I try to make the most of life. This largely entails helping others, which takes me out of my "self". Anyway, I've babbled enough. Feel free to shoot me an email, if you wish to vent.
Take care, one and all...

Akasha writes

reading gorge,
makes me feel like i'm reading some of my own thoughts.
i can relate to alot of your comments, even though i'm a fairly new.
there is something very special in coming home to someone who is waiting for you. its just a pity some women dont treasure this as much as they should. being in a relationship is listening to your partner when they come home.

Gorge writes

Being Single .......... scared and unsure....
I'm 43 and the last time I can remember being single I would have been 21.
I miss just having someone there, not having to say or do anything, but just being there.
I hate coming home to no one when there should be a time to sit and talk about the day and relax with. I miss not having that person beside me when I wake up in the morning, to kiss on the cheek.
So I have been with someone longer than I have been single and now I have to find ways to deal with these emotions..
Other than counselling, this site has been a bonus. I can see that I am not alone, that there are so many other ladies out there who are by themself and are happy.
I'm taking the steps.
I will get there as for the first time in a lot of years I like this person who I am

lager writes

being only 25 and only being in one longterm relationship, I have actually grown to enjoy living on my own and being single. It gives me a chance to do those things I want to do and when I want to do them, I also feel a lot more confident when out socialising.How ever like most I do miss having the cuddles, when I need them but other wise I feel stronger on my own

Jenn writes

Single life has its smiles and frowns, but all together the things that I miss the most are the cuddles and closeness of a partner. Being single for over a year and a half now has given me the personal time to mend & grow. I appreciate the friends that I have and I thankyou to all of them.
May one day the goddess of love smile over all singles.
Here's smiles and the very best to all

SunBelle_74 writes

Oh, and one more rant.....

I think, from within the depths of my soul, one of my utter worst feelings is this:

Working like a dog all week long, and finally coming home to an empty apartment on a Friday evening, when the rest of the world has plans (or atleast seems to)....Knowing, that if you're a person like me, that being a social person, you have tried your best to make plans with either friends or family and it seems that everyone in the world is booked up with something that evening... SO there you are, Friday night, 5PM, nothing to do. Lord knows you fervently try to find it! No one to rush home to to simply talk to and see how their day is, make dinner or go out, say goodnight to...Damn, just to hold someone's hand. SO, instead, you play a mind game with your single self and head to the nearest place in town (like a major bookstore) to fill your head with juicy cerebral bits that might entertain you until 10PM or so and blend in among the other masses, as you languidl

SunBelle_74 writes

Coming and going as I please,
Cooking and cleaning is a breeze.
I eat out often and am on the go,
Looking for the one is tough- I KNOW!
I keep myself busy and try not to think
Of that wonderful woman's arms
Into which I'd sink.
She's gotta be out there,
She damn better be....hopefully...
Hell, I'm only 30!
I'm not a "casual dater", I've never juggled 2 or 3,
I'm not into the whole bar scene either,
I'm just hoping for some good company.
This shouldn't be so hard,
I've got a career, apartment, and a sporty car!
I have my crap together, the drama's put away,
I don't have any Ex's running my way.
I've got a lot to give,
I've learned a lot about myself,
I'm so ready to put this single life on the shelf.
.......It's like looking for a needle in a haystack......And I'm just waiting to be found................
Thanks for allowing me to share!
Hope my one is somewhere, out there.
(Dang that almost sounded like a song!) HA!
Peace, love and light to all you wonder

copitsweet25 writes

I've been single for about a year and a half... at first it was like, 'yeah, I just need this time to find myself and blah blah blah....'

Movies, books, songs, all say that you have to complete yourself before you can effectively have a relationship with someone else.... so I've got the great apartment, a job I love, supportive family, all the material possession... great, what now?

How am I ever going to be truly complete unless I have someone to share all this stuff with?..... just one of life's conundrums I guess.

yoniyantra writes

I have found out, through my life journey, that I am not an easy person to live with. I think for me having my own space is very important. I have felt resentful in the past that someone invaded my territory with their belongnings that I didn't particularly like. If I ever live with anyone again I will continue to insist on separate bedrooms. I need a space that I can have exclusively as my own, to do with as I please.

In regards to social life, I've always been a bit of a 'lone dog' in many ways. I have the habit of enjoying matinees at the cinema by myself and prefer intimate gatherings to parties and bars. This doesn't mean that I don't enjoy companionship. I think my strong personality often overwhelms others. I feel bad for being more of a talker than a listener-a trait I try to subdue(but if I choose not to talk people assume I'm in a bad mood).

One last word about the togetherness thing- I don't think we should all couple up and live together if it is only to allev

Angela writes

I'm with the 'Love It' crew. No guilt trips especially. Wouldn't love it so much if I hadn't had a best buddy with me along the way over the couple of years. Can't deny there is a deeper need to share my life but have been doing that for almost 20 years so all this 'Me Time' is nothing but healthy & good and at last a chance to know me through my own eyes instead of reflected from my partners. Maybe another year or two more... but who knows who'll smile at me next! :-)

nicxploring writes

being single to self with joy, peace and calmness is the key to owning your own life.no one can change you to be somebody else if you are comfortable unless you gave yourself that permission to be in that place. you can be single even when you are weaving your life with another person and still be able to 'detach' without losing that sensational feeling of being in a relationhip.i think that is the greatest gift a woman can honour another woman.


nic

SydChik writes

I think it's a time to 're-discover' yourself and focus on what you really want. I am only recently single and as much as I miss someone to cuddle up to on the couch or kiss goodnight, I am really appreciating the time to myself!

SplashJ29 writes

single is good if you use that time to focus on yourself and learning what makes you happy outside of another person. once you got that, you're set...and if you never compromise those things that make you happy again because of another person, then you'll eventually come across a person that doesnt cause you to have to sacrafice those things, but actually encourages them. do that and in a way you can always live the good parts of being single, and when you find that someone special, you'll have the best of both worlds! you shouldn't be with someone that limits you anyways; but deep down we all need to that companionship, we just gotta learn to be patient. this is all a hypothesis of course, i still havent found her!!!

Celtic Pride writes

I think it has its ups and downs. I have had times where I am so glad that I am single, and other times where I wish I had a partner in life to share some of the good times in life (to have a 'history' if you will).

It would be nice to create a history with someone that appreciates the good and bad times in "our" past, and to look forward to a shared future together...to work for it.

But, then, I have a fear of abandonment, too. I fear that if I DID trust someone to come into my heart and life, they will leave just when the times are at best, or worst. I am all about the term "til death do us part"...relationships DO take work, and there are just too many women out there not willing to work at a relationship. When times get rough, they just tend to wanna go elsewhere.

So, to keep it simple in MY life, I choose to stay single for now. It's lonely at times, but not worth the anxiety to think/analyze other stuff to death...

Make sense to anyone?

CP

sweet thang writes

i think u all lie
u know u miss and crave
i guess i have my good and bad days being single
but i just need to be loved just as much, maybe more than the next person
there is only so much my hand can handle
it doesnt walk and talk and it certainly doesnt wake me up with sweet kisses
u know the truth girls.....

writes

at almost 32 i have been single all my life and some people think that i am not normal but hey i dont care what they think - its my decision to be single, i cannot be bothered picking up army dudes in nightclubs - unlike a lot of my friends have and they have even tried to set me up with some of these jerks and it has never worked with me. i am extremely happy being the person that i want to be and living the single life is the only way to go where i do what i want when i want and with whoever i want and not have to answer to anyone when i want to do something - like draging myself to the nightclubs on my own and girls i do have fun this way - seriously!!!

mukwa writes

i've been single this time for 4 yrs. as i age, i notice it is harder to find possible romantic connections- being in the 50's seems to make one invisible. being rural on top of that adds to the challenge, but i love where i live! my daughter went to university this fall so i am truly alone for the first time in many years. the silence is amazing.

hackneydyke writes

I don't mind living on my own, but I'd love to have a girl friend. Life is lonely being single. It would be good to have someone to love who also loved me too. Just someone to share life with and for mutual support. Friends are very important, but I do miss the closeness you only really get with a lover.

mukwa writes

being single most days is fine. having to do all the chores and work alone takes some getting used to and a lot of planning. occassionally i wonder if this is what the rest of my life looks like. it certainly is a partnered world!

bushflower writes

I LOVE LOVE LOVE single life... I finished a six year relationship two years ago and am absolutely enjoying doing everything when, where and how I want to. I have really regained my idependence - and I think thats a very attractive trait! If I start to feel lonely I just get active as an antidote :-)

HoneyWest writes

I'm among the older members and must say when you hit middle age and are single, the loneliness isn't as easily manageable. It gets harder as you grow older.

On that note, I would ask if anyone has a full membership to LesbianConnect.com, to please contact me. I have a guest membership and have received an email from a nice lady but it came through the site and I cannot respond because of my membership status. I would like to though. So, if anyone can pass a message on for me, I would be appreciative.

Thanks,

Kimmeh writes

I don't know if I like being single or not. I've been single now for 2 years. Being single at first hurt like hell, but that had more to do with my broken heart, than it did with actually being single.

Now, I just don't have the time or energy to share my life with someone else...heck looking after my dog is hard enough. It would be nice be with someone, but it is not something that I feel I need to actively pursue. I have my friends and family to put up with me, so that's good. I think this is a good time for me, because I get to discover me and maybe figure out all the whys in my life.

So, what do I think of single life? It is a great time for reflection and self discovery. One can actively pursue anything without having to worry about the other half's approval or disapproval.

Live it up!

Kathy_Y writes

I have had only one real relationship in my life, and that lasted two years, apart from that I have always been single and I hate it. Apart from those two years, I have only ever known living alone. I think that it is if you have been in a marriage or have had a series of relationships that you appreciate the time with your own company, and the growth that can accompany it; but when being alone stretches from weeks to months to years into a decade or so, being alone wears very thin.

Kathy

femmegirl writes

I hate being single and all i want is an older female who loves to travel to be by my side. Its not that I have to be single because I have many options but i want people to like me more for me and not because I look good or becuase im a model, but all in all I hate it. No one to talk to no one to hold or any of that stufff that lovers do.

kimbow writes

I miss the really good regular sex! I´m a lot healthier when I´m in a r/ship - coz of the sex,
but also coz of the exchange of love and affection, companionship, intimacy, the romance, laughter, fun, etc. It´s the night-time living alone that I hate - no-one to cuddle at night, no-one to whisper sweet nothings to. Sleeping with a dog is just not the same. (i don´t have a dog - i´m pet-minding at the moment.) At least I have company. I don´t care if I´m alone during the day (as I always have plenty to do.)

kitten66 writes

Being single is much better than being in an abusive relationship. Love cannot conquer everything. The only thing i miss is having someone to hold me when i wake from a bad dream ...

ikaikaloa writes

This is my first time single since high school. It is actually pretty exciting. I´ve told many people that in being single, I have found a new sense of freedom I have never experienced before and I get the chance to learn more about the person I am and the person I am becoming. I also have alot of friends here on Maui and now online, and I think friends fill the void of a lover. But, don´t get me wrong, I´m always looking for a woman. I really love women!

vixx writes

i´m not surprised it scares you and who said anything about regulae sex.. that doesn´t seem to be part of my job description!! relationships are good cos you get to explore more but then single is cool cos you get to explore yourself.

writes

Single... I really enjoy it. I see my friends in partnerships going through some really crazy (sometimes unnecessary??) stuff.. to me partnership means another person´s life becomes a part of yours. I find that frightening. I´ll be single until I meet a person that I feel strong with and who has class A qualities to bring into my life.

We all started out single! I just don´t get it, why is there so much emphasis on finding a partner? Why do friends consider me bizarre because I find life pretty blissful without a relathionship and regular sex? Being alone on two feet without any fear is one of the most liberating experiences I know of.
And it´s the greatest way I´ve found to get to know myself.
HOWEVER... I am aware that it probably won´t be this clear cut forever. I´ll have to venture back to relationship land one day... and it really scares me!

chick1ebabe writes

METRICS FOR THE CURIOUS:
Years been dating seriously (ie with sex): 7.5
Number of relationships: 5 (4 women, 1 man)
Longest period being single: 6 months
Shortest period being single: 2 weeks
Longest relationship: 6 years
With whom?: Ex-hubby (only been openly gay for 1.5 yrs)
Longest relationship with a girl: 8 months
Shortest relationship: 3 weeks
Girl or Boy?: Definately girl, girl, girl...
Oldest gf: 33 yrs
Youngest gf: 21 yrs
Older or younger?: Depends on maturity, but generally older or prefer same age - although there was a younger one that did surprise me...

FINAL THOUGHT (I sound a bit like Jerry Springer):
I realise and admit that since coming out, I have been in one relationship after another. This did not allow me to obtain closure from the previous relationship and introduced baggage into the next. This time, I was prepare to stay single for a few years and just enjoy my own company. Who knew that 5 weeks ago this chick is gonna blow me away like no other.

lrish writes

been single i hate it at the time,coming home to a empty house,no one to talk to about your day at work,not able to share the love that you had to give to someone,until one day i found the girl of my dreams,she everything to me,but there days when i wonder what it would be like if i didnt meet her or if i had meet someone else,she help me to see there more to life than be single,been in a relationship is the best thing i have ever done,yet this is my first relationship and ever day she tell me i deserve someone better,but in my eyes no one could look at me or love me the way she does and iam bless to have her by myside!!:)

Kathy_Y writes

I love the idea of having a g/f, but think it is a good idea of space.. I would like to have a situation where I was in a close loving relationship, but we weren´t living in each others pockets, or joined at the hip. Why no the idea of living in close proximity (even next door) and coming to gether very often when we wanted to, but if we followed different interests we would not be subject to the other´s timetable...

writes

i hate it. its icky.

anonymous writes

Have to be anonymous so my GF doesn´t read this!!!

I have only just found a great GF after many months of being single. The GF is wonderful and will do anything for me, maybe too much.

I do miss being single and being able to do whatever, whenever, however...a bit like having kids or pets....

I think I am getting to the point of wanting to be perpetually single and just enjoy the company of girls...with no label on what we have...I have grown to be truly happy with myself and my life and have no immediate need for anything other than my family, friends and casual company...my god I sound like one of my male friends!!

kimbow writes

Hi Kuinip, yes 14 years is a long time single.
But you are probably a really together person.
If I added up the number of years I have been single/alone, it would be approx. 6 years out of 46 years. Not counting my childhood, that would be about 6 yrs out of about 30 years. Not very good with maths, so you can figure out the percentage. Anyway, it´s pretty small! Consequently, I am a very independant person. Being single is not my preferred choice. I would actually love to be in a relationship. I have thoroughly enjoyed the times I have been in r/ship. I see them as gifts, blessings, and very healing for my soul. The r/ships we have depend on our karma and fate and what we need to learn. The only time I don´t enjoy being single is when I first break up with someone. Once I´m over the emotional shock and trauma, I´m O.K. I can then enjoy my freedom again. Sometimes it can take me 2 years to get over someone I´ve been with, even if I´ve

Miracle writes

Ahh single life- For the first time is 15 years I find myself single, on purpose now because I need this time to deal with "stuff" I am enjoying the freedom- My entire life is changing and finally I am able to concerntrate on "me" for a while which is something that I need to do.

My life is changing finally I have my own sleeping pattern, I am eating what I want which actually means I am eating much healthier, just looking after myself both inside and out- It is delibrate that I have cut myself off from dating because I am a "giver" and every so oftern you need to charge your batteries- and mine were FLAT!

But most importantly I am using the time for good, to improve myself, get massives amounts of work done, organising my life and finding "me" back. Somewhere in having a lifetime of relationships "me" always came second.

I have discovered things about myself as well- I am using this time to do good for me and that personally is an amzing experience because I have never d

littlemonkey writes

I find it interesting that not so many peolpe comment on the topic. I did not comment on it at first, till I saw someone calling for comments... And I started with asking myself why I did not jump in at the beginning.... The answer is still somewhere else, not in my mind, but I´m pretty sure it has something to do with the fact now I am single.
Even though I´ve been single for a while and feel comfortable with it, I still miss the time being with someone. I think the worst thing about living with my gf was that we spent many nights talking to each other through the night. The consequence was I could hardly woke up the next day. Also, I had to eat all the things she cooked, and it was not always good.... hmm... when I´m alone, I cook and just dump it if I can´t swallow it.
I am still not sure whether I prefer to be single or not. Of course it has its own good and bad, but I think the main point is to be happy. And happiness only depends on what you think...

geekybird writes

I kind of think your own life is a path you walk on alone. Sometimes you don´t know where it´s taking you, other times it´s clearly signposted, other times you forge your own when you don´t like the ones laid out...

Being in a relationship with someone is like agreeing to walk the same path as them (or they you, ideally a compromise!) for as long as it lasts. We like to promise each other forever, but reality says it´s as long as our paths are going the same way. When one of you veers off or gets distracted by a passer by, you lose your way.

Being single is an important part of getting yourself back on track again...I´ve sometimes found I´ve wandered away from my own path and inadvertently taken someone else´s when in a relationship...and then wondered why I wasn´t fulfilled.

So, I say, by all means share paths, or walk the path alone - you need a bit of both throughout your life. But the truth is, you started your life alo

Idream1064 writes

Being single for a time is important, especially if you have just come out of a relationship. Whether that relationship was good or bad, people need to find out who "they" are as individuals not the "us" as in relationship, which can take time to find out as it can be very confusing to some.

To know yourself and be happy in your own company is important as you wont be happy until you are content in yourself.

So to me, being single for a time no matter how long is important, it´s a growing period, a self reflecting period, a learning period, I truley don´t believe you can grow or move forward until you have experienced this or more importantly learn´t by it.

lessa writes

well - i´ve been single for 9 years

i´ve learned that it´s important to be happy with who you are first - then on to the relationships

for me - having been ´out´ for 6 months (although i realised while in conversation with a friend yesterday that there was a point about 2 years ago when it suddenly dawned on me that i was gay!) i´ve met a number of wonderful women - done lots of social stuff - and am trying to figure out exactly what dating entails ...

i´d like to find the "one" for me ... but if it doesn´t happen in the near future that´s ok ... i´m fine by myself

AND100 writes

I cannot understand why more people have not commented on this. Have we all not beem single at one time or another...?

For how ever long, single is single, you either love it or hate it, please comment

urbanamazon writes

I would say there´s positives and negatives to both.. i´m single right now, after being in a very unhealthy relationship with someone who pretty much drained my soul... In that regard tis better 2 b single than abused! You have to be careful with ur heart and accept that all relationships take a lot of work. With the right person perhaps I could do it again..its nice to have someone to curl up to...to chat about nothin and everything with.. but there are many advantages to being single too.. like the freedom to follow your dreams.. i really couldn´t say which is better right now?

locke writes

Love being single....
our society things there is something wrong with you if you are not attached to somebody by the time you are 30.
I have met lots of womin who think they are not complete without a partner...
I find it hard to adjust to a r´ship after I have been single for a while, because I arranged my life around myself, do what I want and don´t have to concider anybody else. Feel complete and in total control, don´t have to deal with my own insecurities (they don´t come up when I am single)or with the ones of your partner. Have good friends which fullfill half of the desires you want from a r´ship. The only short fall is the physical attraction and is it worth to give up freedom for just that one part? ...
And there is that baggage so many womin carry around....
yes, I am happy to be single and then again fall into that trap of ´love´ from time to time ....

rockenfab4 writes

One word describes me being single and thats i hate it with a passion, i have enough love in me too share it with that special woman, but im yet too find her and doubt whether i ever will, and theres absolutely nothing wrong with me except im such a softy i seem too attract the ones who not only have baggage they seem too have the whole qantas cargo hold!!!. Im loyal im honest im respectful, have a wicked sense of humour, and do know how too treat a woman and spoil her, ive not been a cheater or ever will, ive never abused a woman either physically or mentally but never will, half my problem is i seem to only be attracted to femme women, i quite often think when im alone, which is most of the time,that i might as well be with my father he didnt lead the best of lives he was a loner and he had a terminal illness diagnosed 5 years ago and he passed away 12 months ago on the 6th of june, that i know being alone that day wont be easy.

kuinip writes

Have been single for about 14 years now, have needed that time to find myself and learn who I am, thoroughly enjoyed it, has been one hell of a journey. And I have been lucky enough to have some great friends around to share the ups and downs with. I´ve always been too busy for a relationship anyway never had the time, am at a point now where I would like to share my life with someone special, but I´m still not rushing it though.

QDykes writes

There was a time when being single was exactly what was needed - space to work thru stuff ... after 10 years of being single for one of us and 14 years if being single for the other, being in a partnership is just exactly what we need now. Like lotsa things, the "now" is what´s important, not whether it´s this thing or that thing.

AND100 writes

Being Single....? I have been for 9 months now and I still cannot get used to it. I have been in realtionships since I was 18 and have only ever had maybe at most 2 months on my own.

It is the first ever time I have had to live on my own which was and still is hard. The empty house I have to come home to every night. The empty bed I have to climb into alone every night.

I still love and am totally in love with my ex who left me after nearly 7 years for another woman. But shit happens and you have to deal with it.

I was meant to share my life with someone as I am a very giving person and do not like to be alone but I am not just going to jump into anything just to avoid being alone, that is not me.

If it takes 6 months or 6 years, when the time is right and the woman is right then I will know. But for now my ex is all I think about and the time we are missing together, sharing our lives. I will eventually move on........but not yet.

otter writes

I agree somewht with Candy, being single has its ups, like the independence and freedom and only having to worry about you.

I prefer to be attached though, to me there´s no better feeling, than to share your life with someone you love and admire, the hugs and kisses, snuggly nights at home, someone to share your most intimate thoughts with. To wake up next to someone that you love, to me
there is no better feeling.

Otter ;)

Candy Lips writes

I love being single. Love the independence and freedom. I have such amazing friends and never feel like I´m missing out. Well maybe some things, but don´t feel an emptiness nor do I feel the need to just "fill a void". It´s about choosing how you want to live, finding personal fulfilment and self values. I constantly get asked "why are you single" like there´s something wrong with it. I choose to be single like most things, you can choose to love, hate etc. Emotions are just that - a choice and it´s what you do with them. Relationships are just not on my "to do list". Someone pretty amazing would have to come along to change that but I´m not looking (don´t have the time). Think I´ve gone off the topic. LOL. Ok, that´s my rant for the day. Ciao :)